How To Deal With Rejection in Dating
Stick around.
You’ll gain knowledge on how to handle rejection in the dating world, and not internalize it.
Discover how to:
· learn the 6 steps of handling rejection
· know what to do and not do.
· remove the bad feelings from rejection,
· RE-FRAME the situation and be more empowered than ever
· continue dating with confidence
You had a great first date.
Or you were dating a guy for a while.
There were ALL.THE.THINGS:
✅ similar values and interests
✅ major chemistry
✅ easy-flowing and interesting conversation
✅ a sense of excitement
Plus, you were confident.
You KNEW he liked you.
If it was a first date scenario:
He didn’t reach out the next day, to your utter disappointment.
You figured he was playing the whole “wait 3 days before I contact her” game.
Now it’s a week later without a peep from him.
You don't know what happened.
The rejection hurts deeply.
If you’d been dating for a month or two scenario:
Something started to feel different.
His vibe changed.
He sent you fewer texts, called less frequently and saw you less.
How To Deal with Being Rejected By A Guy: The 6 Steps
#1. Accept the situation
It may tempt you to reach out to him and convince him to stick around.
Or tell him he’s making a mistake and may regret it.
And let him know he won't find a woman like you again.
Don’t freaking do that!
He will be sure he made the right decision if you say those things.
Instead, you’ll want to handle the situation like a lady.
If it’s a situation where you’re not being ghosted.
But you’re rejected face to face or via phone call or text.
Remain calm.
Acknowledge his decision.
“Thanks for letting me know.”
“I respect that.”
If you can stay calm, ask him what swayed him to that decision.
I suggest not peppering him with lots of questions.
Keep in mind that he may not be truthful so that he can spare your feelings.
If it’s a situation where you’re being ghosted.
You may never know the reason.
Keep reading this post for how to deal with what you’re going through.
#2. Have self-compassion
Treat yourself with the utmost love and care.
Don’t blame yourself for not knowing this was going to happen.
Even if you did, there’s probably nothing you could have done to prevent it.
Most of the time, rejection comes as a surprise.
Don't berate yourself for not being able to move on from the hurt of being rejected.
#3. Allow yourself to identify and process your emotions
Acknowledge your emotions.
Admit to yourself what you’re feeling.
Don’t try to minimize or mask your pain.
That would only delay your getting through it.
#4. Acknowledge your courage.
Dating is SUCH a vulnerable thing to do.
And it always involves taking risks.
There are no exceptions for anyone when it comes to dating successfully.
If someone isn’t willing to sit with the butterflies of nerves and uncertainty that accompany dating, then they can’t expect to find the right person and then develop a strong and lasting connection.
But YOU are!
So, applaud yourself for actually putting yourself in the dating world.
#5. Re-frame the situation
I promise you’ll feel better soon about the situation!
Rejection in dating can sting hard.
That’s no wonder because we’re WIRED to fear rejection.
It can feel even worse than physical pain.
Some coaches try to get you to be “rejection-proof”.
But that’s not even possible.
Nor is it healthy or empowering.
What you need to understand:
· If you’re dating a guy and he breaks it off…
· Or if you’re chatting with a guy online…and he disappears after what you felt was a growing connection….
It helps to re-frame the situation into something more EMPOWERING.
The # 1 way to not allow rejection to knock you down is to…
REMEMBER this ONE thing.
Rejection is NOT about you.
And there’s no use in trying to pick everything apart to figure out “what you did wrong”.
What if you did NOTHING wrong?
Let me be very clear!
It IS possible that you may need to make some shifts if you notice that you’re continually getting rejected.
That small thing that you don't notice can be the deal breaker that stops men from wanting to have a second date or form a connection.
You can’t see the problem because you’re IN it.
It’s like trying to look at a photo from inside the frame.
If you're too close to the problem, you may not be able to see what the REAL problem IS and what you need to do to fix it.
I encourage you to get support from a dating coach so that the issue can be brought to light quickly.
How to Re-frame The Rejection:
It’s not the rejection itself that hurts you.
The actual issue is the MEANING you attach to it.
When women experience this, they can make it mean that they’re not “good enough” or “not worthy”.
But this is just a story.
Prompts for Dealing with Rejection in Dating
Aim to question yourself like a 5-year-old
And understand the WHY of everything you believe about yourself
What does rejection feel like (in my body)?
Is rejection about me? Why or why not?
Is rejection more about the other person? Why or why not?
What am I making rejection mean about me?
What are some benefits of rejection?
What would happen if we didn’t reject people? (love this one)
What is an empowering re-frame I can create about rejection?
#6. Normalize rejection
Is Rejection Normal In Dating?
Absolutely, yes!
Everyone gets rejected in dating for a myriad of reasons.
This affects everyone from the drop-dead gorgeous to the rich, talented and so on.
When a man rejects you, remember that for reasons of his own, which may have NOTHING to do with you, he decided he didn’t feel the connection he was looking for.
He was most likely talking/seeing other women...perhaps he met one that he really liked.
And decided to not proceed with you.
There are a GAZILLION other reasons he told you he wasn’t ready for a relationship or disappeared.
And if you’re getting rejected in dating, that means that you’re actually TRYING to find the RIGHT guy.
You’re putting yourself out there, DESPITE the risks.
Nice work!
And it also means that you’re one step CLOSER to finding him.
Rejection is part of SUCCESS in life: career, friendship and love, etc.
Rejection is the Universe’s way of telling you that you’re meant to go in a different direction.
It also helps you stop wasting time dating the wrong men.
It’s the Universe’s way of protecting you…
From someone who’s NOT meant for you.
And it’s preserving your time, effort and energy.
Because the RIGHT man for you won’t reject you.
Keep going on finding the right guy.
Mel XOXO